A question I’ve been asking myself lately is: if you aren’t part of a religious group, how do you build community as an adult?
Especially after school age (past post-secondary school), without these kinds of “built in” communities, like the ones that exist at church, how does one go about creating a community of their own?
I work at a family-run business that is rooted in Christianity, but I myself would no longer identify as a Christian. Though I was raised in the church, I no longer choose to participate in organized religion. But recently I’ve been feeling like it may be the only option for me to regain the sense of community I feel I’ve been missing.
Being an atheist/agnostic feels like a comparatively lonely existence. There are no friendships outside of religion and work (or at least very few) in which you see each other on a weekly or more than weekly basis. Church is an easy way to consistently see others on a weekly basis.
It often helps in making new friends too. You know you have something in common instantly when you are both Christians. You know you hold the same values. You can envelop new people into the fold with ease in a church community. You can also (in theory) trust that they are a good person because Christian values suggest a person is striving towards being one in their daily life.
Why do I care?
For many years I have been aching for some undefinable sense of belonging and community, and I wonder if this void I fee is due to my upbringing. My mother was the daughter of a minister. Although I never knew him, (my grandfather died when I was 2,) the ripple effects of his beliefs and his profession were profoundly deep in our family. All of this to say: my mother was devout. We attended church every Sunday.
We participated in church activities: BBQs, fundraisers, acts of volunteering and charity work. I went to Sunday school, vacation bible school in the summer, and residential Christian camp when I was older. Most of my relationships during my youth, as well as my now husband come from that era of my life.
For an atheist/agnostic, where do we find such a natural “built in” community outside of religion?
Can the slow living movement present an opportunity to create our own? What would bring us together? We would certainly share a sense of values.
It may not be as deeply ritualized as religion, but slow living does offer us a set of values to live by, and I hope we can dive deeper into those together.
What are your thoughts? Can we create a community without god?
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